Lifestyles of the single and not-so-famous

Tags: singles, monogamy, infidelity, exercise for weight control, studies concerning sex drive, fad diets, nutrition, physiological programming 

 

Raquel Welch: 1 Million Yrs. B.C.

Nowadays people think hunters and gatherers were of a society long ago... But I beg to differ. In fact, we're all still hunting. The only thing that's changed is what we're shooting the spears at. 

On warm nights the cavelady nestles next to her caveman as her war paint (lash-fattening mascara) and high-tech weaponry (hair straighteners and high heels) grow dust from a war fought long ago. Ah, yes, married folks enjoy a deep sense of companionship that only Tarzan and Jane truly understand. Outside the cave, though, conditions are not so safe for us "spinsters".... 

I'll be the first to admit that I, like other singletons, get excited when I make a new pal who is also flying solo. After all, no one likes to do battle alone. One-man armies don't exactly stack up the victories...

We need a back-up, a tennis buddy, a squirt of ketchup on our fries. Humans, like their animal counterparts, enjoy pairs, whether they be of things, people, or munchies. Dating is no different. We need that buddy to gab to when a date goes well (or goes down in flames :D).  

But single pals are worth their weight in gold for other reasons. Sometimes they give us little nuggets of wisdom that we didn't know, or that we had been forgetting to put into place. Take Lady Esther, for instance. On my way home tonight, as I pondered excuses to skip my work-out, I received her text. It just so happened that she was already in the gym. Except she added that she was "getting ready for bikini season."

I thought to myself, sounds more like open season, and I jokingly responded that I didn't know she was a hunter like myself.  She argued that she was not a hunter; rather, her goal is to look like the kind of fit man she wants to attract.

Clever, Lady E. Very clever. I still say you are hunting, but let's take a moment to analyze this.

Here's something all of us - men, women, single, married, divorced - should bear in mind. The qualities we are looking for in a mate should be qualities that we already exhibit, or at least that we are working hard toward achieving. Otherwise, why would we have any right to demand it from another?

Likewise, it's important for people already in relationships to take care of themselves. Ladies, I feel compelled to point out that this may be more important for us than for men. Recent research published in the Oxford University Press (see link below) says "even when both men and women make a heartfelt, sacred vow of chastity, the men find it much harder to keep than the woman."  The study also said that not only do men have a much stronger sex drive than women, they will take more risks and incur more costs for sex. (Remember President Clinton!) 

Truthfully we are all physiologically programmed to prowl: monogamy is only possible because humans make a concerted effort to stay faithful. I believe a majority of married people would agree (hitched folks, this is your cue to comment.) The point is that if we are looking our best, and feeling our best (both directly related to exercise), then we are making our mates' jobs (complete and loving fidelity) all the more easy.

It's equally important for us to take care of ourselves the right way. Last year my older sister, Alyssa, dropped over 60 lbs. People who saw her afterward were in a state of shock. The immediate reaction was, what was her "diet trick"? I would simply laugh and say, mathematics. 

It’s not new news that fad diets are unsuccessful over the long term. Time and again studies show that people who yo-yo diet are more likely to gain more weight after their diet is over than if they didn’t diet at all. Not to mention how unhealthy this is for the human body. 

“Most individuals want cutting-edge solutions for weight loss, and fad diets offer, at least on the surface, ‘new’ ways to beat the boring mathematical reality of long-term weight loss,” says Robin Steagall, nutrition communications manager for the Calorie Control Council.

Truth be told, the proper solution does take longer, but it produces healthier results and habits that one can live with forever. Which brings me back to Alyssa's success. One tool that aided her was livestrong.com, a daily calorie and exercise calculator that tracks your weight loss. Over the months I watched her send the pounds packing as she completely re-arranged her lifestyle habits. Imagine that.. the old fashioned "burn more than you consume actually" works.  Of course it took discipline on her part. But she had her eyes on the ball, so that when she swung, she was sure to hit. 

Some advice to others looking to develop that same discipline is, number one, listen to the motivational experts who say it takes 20 days to build a habit. Find a way to be active in some respect for 20 days, and after that, you will feel odd if you don't exercise. I am living proof of this. I am certainly not the slimmest chicken, but I enjoy a great energy level and I've maintained my weight for 7 years in part because I've committed myself to 20 minutes of activity per day, whether it be dancing like a maniac in my bedroom or trotting around my neighborhood.

Second, use your FREE resources: Google shows 488,000,000 results from a mere "health advice" search.

Another important tip that many successful weight-droppers have reported is that you should write down your goals in specific detail, and write down why they are important to you. The slew of health problems linked to being overweight and improper nutrition should be enough to influence people to care for their temples. But everyone has their own reasons.. what are yours? To age gracefully? To influence your family to be healthy, too? Or just to feel great?

Or maybe, like Esther and I, you want the best possible armor, so that when Mr. or Mrs. Future Flinstone comes walking by, you'll be ready ;) 

Sources and Recommended Readings:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cultural-animal/201012/the-reality-the-male-sex-drive